Game of Thrones: the annual reminder that life sucks without dwarves, ice zombies and boobs* dragons. The show that gets your Grandma cheering when a man gets devoured by his lovable dogs. And the thing that will take over Monday conversations at work for the next seven weeks. I cannot wait! And in celebration, I have broken down the show’s characters into investment/personal finance personas (because I am just that cool). So on a scale of Jon Snow to ten, how much do you know?
Jon. A fan favourite and frequent visitor of the Money Tree Lady’s night-time muses, Jon represents an investor who is aware of the dangers out there. He respects and fears these dangers and so he is reserved when it comes to putting his money on the line.
As a bastard, he didn’t start with much and so the wealth he has accumulated over time is extremely precious to him. He has invested in things that he didn’t initially like, which lead him to experience rocky times with in his investments. In fact he often states that those times were “like getting stabbed six times in the chest”, whatever that means… But his investments came through in the end and he is now better for it.
He may be in for an inheritance windfall…
The perfect re-investment strategy personified, Daenerys used the little that she started off with to acquire more. This was then copied and pasted again and again, compounding her efforts until her passive income streams reached critical mass.
A squad of loyal friends that she has invested in over a long time provide her with badass solutions to complex problems especially when her back is on the ropes. She also takes time to help those worse of than herself. Despite rarely doing this for self-gain, she usually benefits indirectly from it.
An illustration of what can come from having a clear goal and relentlessly pursuing it… Having three dragons doesn’t exactly hurt your chances of getting what you want either.
Theon had a decent thing going, but got a bit to big for his boots. Upon deciding to change shit up, he quickly realised that he really should have educated himself first. Tough times followed, in that he lost… erm… a major asset in his portfolio**.
After much suffering for his ignorance, he finally began attempting to make something of himself by enlisting the help of other, more experienced investors. They may now help him conquer his biggest challenges yet… Or he could die… Either way…
Boring, brooding, brainless, bratty, Bran. Directly responsible for various people losing all their money just because he was a bit curious, Bran represents somebody who does literally nothing with their money. And that isn’t to say they don’t have much. They have a lot, and occasionally threaten to put it to good use, but more often than not it’s something very boring that we don’t care about…
He may invest in something interesting soon.
Potential case of severe Type II Little Bitch Syndrome.
The gun-ho investor. Coming from wealth, she has literally been able to crap out gold on a whim. This has developed her reckless nature, leaving her with very little consideration of the collateral damage her investment activities can cause.
Prone to massive gains as well as massive losses, her support appears to be waning. She may lose it all if she continues down this road amidst the coming apocalypse.
To the naked eye, Tyrion’s portfolio may appear rather tame, but he has had to grind for every investment victory. Extremely well read, Tyrion’s knowledge on the subtleties of investment strategy has lead him to proving all his doubters wrong. Not that he cares though. He is not doing it for them. A drive to improve both himself and his environment has lead Tyrion to teach and advise others on good portfolio management and building a good network of wealth and income.
Tyrion displays Warren Buffet-esque loyalty to his investments, even during the tough times, and the fruits of doing so have been lavishly poured out.
*shame… shame… shame…
** His penis. He lost his penis.